My Folks Were English . . .

Golf Is A Game That Needlessly Prolongs The Lives Of Some Of Our Most Useless Citizens.

I've Always Felt England Was A Great Place For A Comic To Work. It's An Island And The Audience Can't Run Very Far.

I've Always Been In The Right Place And Time. Of Course, I Steered Myself There.

My Old Friend Jack Benny Has Only Had One Ball All His Golfing Life. And Now He's Lost It. The String Came Off!

You Know You're Getting Old When The Candles Cost More Than The Cake.