You Want To Look Younger... Rent Smaller

We Have Far Too Many Kids. At One Time In The Playpen There Was Standing-room Only. It Looked Like A Bus Stop For Midgets. It Used To Get So Damp In There, We'd Have A Rainbow Above It.

Mothers-in-law Do Not Make Good House Pets. Once I Had The Most Wonderful Dream -- I Dreamed That Mothers-in-law Cost Money And I Couldn't Afford One.

My Doctor Is A Family Physician. He Treats My Family And I Support His.

Choose A Checked Or Striped Wall Paper. People Will Be Halfway Home Before They Are Able To Focus.

You've Got To Realize That When All Goes Well, And Everything Is Beautiful, You Have No Comedy. It's When Somebody Steps On The Bride's Train, Or Belches During The Ceremony That You've Got Comedy!