I'm The Woman Who Used To Think

The Only Thing My Husband And I Have In Common Is That We Were Married On The Same Day.

Carry An Oar When You Drive. Three Times I've Ended Up In Water.

I Want My Children To Have All The Things I Couldn't Afford. Then I Want To Move In With Them.

My Body's In Such Bad Shape I Wear Prescription Underwear.

There's So Little Money In My Bank Account, My Scenic Checks Show A Ghetto.