The Last Thing My Kids Ever Did

Get Married With The Feeling It Is Going To Last. Not Like The Bride I Know Who Doubled The Wedding Cake Recipe And Froze One.

My Sister-in-law Is So Skinny That She Has A Striped Dress With Only One Stripe.

Carry An Oar When You Drive. Three Times I've Ended Up In Water.

They Just Elected Me Mis Phonograph Record Of 1966. They Discovered My Measurements Were 33 1/2, 45, 78!

When I Go To The Beach, My Grandchildren Try To Make Words Out Of The Veins In My Legs. That's Why I Still Take The Pill; I Don't Want Any More Grandchildren.