Back In My Rummy Days, I Would

Thou Shalt Not Kill Anything Less Than A Fifth.

If It Is A Joint Return, We Are Instructed To Print The Given Names Of Both Husband And Wife. But Since Some Of The Names That Husband And Wife Give Each Other Are Hardly Suited To Print, We Must Proceed Cautiously.

The Funniest Thing About Comedy Is That You Never Know Why People Laugh. I Know What Makes Them Laugh But Trying To Get Your Hands On The Why Of It Is Like Trying To Pick An Eel Out Of A Tub Of Water.

You Can Fool Some Of The People Some Of The Time -- And That's Enough To Make A Decent Living.

Now Don't Say You Can't Swear Off Drinking; It's Easy. I've Done It A Thousand Times.