You Can Lead A Man To Congress,

They've Got Plastic Christmas Trees Now. They're Hard To Tell From The Real Aluminum Ones.

I Just Filled Out My Income Tax Forms. Who Says You Can't Get Killed By A Blank?

In The Suburbs It's Hard To Buy Your Christmas Gifts Early In The Year. You Never Know Who Your Friends Will Be In December.

The Post Office Is Very Careful Nowadays. When They Get A Package Marked "fragile," They Throw It Underhand.

A Thing Of Beauty Is A Job Forever.