Well, As You Know, I'm Really Only

I'm A Walking, Talking Enigma. We're A Dying Breed.

Who Do You Think Has More Freedom: The Married Man In America Or The Single Man In Communist China?

I Was Planning On My Future As A Homeless Person. I Had A Really Good Spot Picked Out.

All Of A Sudden I Discovered That I'm Allergic To Caviar. It Was The Perfect Metaphor For My Life. When I Was Only Able To Afford Bad Caviar, I Could Certainly Eat My Fill Of It.

I Tolerate Lactose Like I Tolerate People.