Vice President Spiro Agnew Can Not Cheat

Jimmy Stewart Could Have Been A Good Golfer, But He Speaks So Slowly That By The Time He Yells 'fore!' The Guy He's Hit Is Already In An Ambulance On The Way To The Hospital.

I've Been Married Fifty-five Years And I've Been Home Three Weeks.

Seventy Years Of Ad-lib Material, And I Am Speechless.

A Very, Very Religious Man. Every Time I Eat A Peanut, I Feel Immortal.

The Firm Is Really Ahead Of The Times. It Has A Stock Market Ticker That Prints Its Report On Thin Aspirins.