The Thing Is, I'm Happiest When I'm

I Was Not An Attractive Child.

Why Should I Cook For My Husband? So He Can Tell A Hooker I Make A Delicious Cake?

I Like Colonic Irrigation Because Sometimes You Find Old Jewelry.

I Felt A Comedy Ego Beginning To Grow, Which Gave Me The Courage To Begin Tentatively Looking Into Myself For Material.

My Husband Wanted To Be Cremated. I Told Him I'd Scatter His Ashes At Neiman Marcus - That Way, I'd Visit Him Every Day.