...the Elephant Smoked Too Much.

I Only Know Two Pieces; One Is 'clair De Lune' And The Other One Isn't.

One Afternoon, When I Was Four Years Old, My Father Came Home, And He Found Me In The Living Room In Front Of A Roaring Fire, Which Made Him Very Angry. Because We Didn't Have A Fireplace.

Many People Have Asked Me Why There Are Three Pedals In These Grand Pianos. Well The Pedal In The Middle Is There To Separate The Two Other Pedals.

A Smile Is A Curve Which Can Set A Lot Of Things Straight.

I Do Not Have A Single White Note On My Piano; My Elephant Smoked Too Much.