Run Scared ... And They Never Catch

In Life The Only Thing That You Can Expect Is The Unexpected; The Only Surprise Is A Day That Has None.

How To Fool Yourself Into Feeling Younger: When You Go To Restaurants, Always Check A Coat And A Skateboard.

Keep Moving. It's Hard For Old Age To Hit A Moving Target.

Is Elizabeth Taylor Fat? Her Favorite Food Is Seconds.

People Are Arguing Whether Mel Gibson's "passion Of The Christ" Is Anti-semitic. Well, Whether It Is Or It Isn't, It Doesn't Matter, Because I've Been In Touch With His Accounting Firm, Rosencrantz, Levy And Stern, And They're Screwing Him Out Of His Profits.