People Seldom Live Up To Their Baby

Once I Opened Up A Fortune Cookie And Inside Was The Guy's Cheque Next To Me I Said Hey Buddy I Got Your Cheque He Said Thanks.

When We Got Married My Wife Told Me I Was One In A Million. I Found Out She Was Right.

My Doctor Told Me To Watch My Drinking. Now I Drink In Front Of A Mirror.

I'm A Downer. I've Been Depressed My Whole Life. Figure It Out.

It's Tough To Stay Married. My Wife Says No Because She's Tired Then Stays Up And Reads Her Book.