My Wife Met Me At The Door

Look Out For Number One And Try Not To Step In Number Two.

She Was So Ugly That Her Face Could Stop A Sundial.

I Once Asked A Policeman How Far It Was To The Subway. He Said, "i Don't Know, No One Has Ever Made It".

Hey Everybody, We're All Gonna Get Laid!

I Tell Ya, I Was An Ugly Kid. I Was So Ugly That My Dad Kept The Kid's Picture That Came With The Wallet He Bought.