My Son Says I Never Tell Stories

A Summary Of Every Jewish Holiday: They Tried To Kill Us, We Won, Let's Eat!

There's Nobody To Believe In Anymore, Nobody To Trust.

I Won't Eat In A Place That Has Suits Of Armor.

Modesty Is Not One Of My Virtues.

Milton Took Vaudeville, Which, If You Look Up 'vaudeville' In The Dictionary, Right Alongside Of It, It Says 'milton Berle' - And He Made It Just A Tremendous Party.