It's Tough To Stay Married. My Wife

My Mom Took Me To A Dog Show And I Won!!

When I Was Born I Was So Ugly The Doctor Slapped My Mother.

I Told My Kids, "someday, You'll Have Kids Of Your Own." One Of Them Said, "so Will You."

I Worked In A Pet Store And People Would Ask How Big I Would Get.

I'll Tell Ya, I Don't Get No Respect... The Other Day, I Got Back From A Business Trip. I Got In A Cab And Said To The Driver, "hey! Take Me To Where The Action Is!" So Ya Know Where He Took Me? He Took Me To My House!