I Was A Poster Child... For Birth

When I Was A Kid We Were So Poor, If I Hadn't Been A Boy I Wouldn't Have Had Anything To Play With.

Last Halloween A Kid Tried To Rip My Face Off. He Thought It Was A Mask. Now It's Different When I Open The Door The Kids Hand Me Candy.

Life Is Full Of Temporary Situations, Ultimately Ending In A Permanent Solution.

Cars And Women Are A Lot Alike. They Lie About The Milage.

One Time My Whole Family Played Hide And Seek. They Found My Mother In Pittsburgh!