I Take New Years With A Grain

Do You Realise That Eve Was The Only Woman Who Ever Took A Man's Side?

Do You Want To Feel Insecure? Count The Number Of Christmas Cards You Sent Out, And Then Count Those You Received.

Talk About Cheap - On Christmas Eve, My Neighbour Shoots Off Three Blanks And Tells His Kids Santa Claus Just Committed Suicide.

I Just Filled Out My Income Tax Forms. Who Says You Can't Get Killed By A Blank?

Just Remember, Golf Is Flog Spelled Backwards.