I Prefer Offenbach To Bach Often.

When Asked Whether He Minded If Someone Smoked In A Non-smoking Compartment. Certainly Not If You Don't Object If I'm Sick.

A Musicologist Is A Man Who Can Read Music But Cannot Hear It.

No Woman Is Worth The Loss Of A Night's Sleep.

Composers And Musicians Have Always Starved And, As This Is A Sentimental Country, We Think The Tradition Should Be Continued.

Madam, You Have Between Your Legs An Instrument Capable Of Giving Pleasure To Thousands And All You Can Do Is Scratch It.