I Like Children. If They're Properly Cooked.

I Exercise Strong Self Control. I Never Drink Anything Stronger Than Gin Before Breakfast.

Happiness Means Quiet Nerves.

Business Is An Establishment That Gives You The Legal, Even Though Unethical, Right To Screw The Naive-right, Left, And In The Middle.

I Drink With Impunity...or Anyone Else Who Invites Me.

I Didn't Squawk About The Steak, Dear. I Merely Said I Didn't See That Old Horse That Used To Be Tethered Outside Here.