I Bought A Perfect Second Car... A

My Family Was A Bunch Of Drunks. When I Was Six I Came Up Missing, They Put My Picture On A Bottle Of Scotch.

Last Year My Birthday Cake Looked Like A Prairie Fire.

Do Ya Remember The First Time You Had Sex? I Do, And Boy, Was I Scared! I Was Alone!

I Can't Get No Respect.

My Wife Has To Be The Worst Cook. I Don't Believe Meatloaf Should Glow In The Dark