All Men Look Nerdy In Black Socks

Never Take Candy From Strangers.

Most Turkeys Taste Better The Day After; My Mother's Tasted Better The Day Before.

My Father Watched Football With The Sound Off Because He Lived In Fear Of Hearing The Voice Of Howard Cosell.

Men Would Like Monogamy Better If It Sounded Less Like Monotony.

Be Careful Of Men Who Are Bald And Rich; The Arrogance Of "rich" Usually Cancels Out The Nice Of "bald".