You Made One Mistake. You Married Me.

God Forgive Us-but Most Of Us Grew Up To Be The Sort Of Men Our Mothers Warned Us Against.

Critics Are Like Eunuchs; They Can Tell You What To Do, But They Can't Do It Themselves!

I Am Married To Beatrice Salkeld, A Painter. We Have No Children, Except Me.

I Have A Total Irreverence For Anything Connected With Society Except That Which Makes The Roads Safer, The Beer Stronger, The Food Cheaper And The Old Men And Old Women Warmer In The Winter And Happier In The Summer.

If It Was Raining Soup, The Irish Would Go Out With Forks.