Whenever I Wear Something Expensive It Looks

I Hate All Those Weathermen, Too, Who Tell You That Rain Is Bad Weather. There's No Such Thing As Bad Weather, Just The Wrong Clothing.

The Great Thing About Glasgow Is That If There's A Nuclear Attack It'll Look Exactly The Same Afterwards.

I Think The Longer Britain Is In Europe The Better.

A Fart Is Just Your Arse Applauding.

Why Do They Call It An Asteroid When It's Outside The Hemisphere, But Call It A Haemorrhoid When It's On The Outside Of Your Ass?