This Man I Was Going With Asked

Your Husband Is Lazy If Coffee Doesn't Keep Him Awake - Even When It's Hot And Being Spilled On Him.

The Last Thing I'd Learn, Well Into My Career, Was How To Get On, How To Say Hello, How To Get In With The Audience.

Oh, That Dog! Ever Hear Of A German Shepherd That Bites Its Nails? Barks With A Lisp? You Say, "attack!" And He Has One. All He Does Is Piddle. He's Nothing But A Fur-covered Kidney That Barks.

All I Ever Learned At My Mother's Knee Was What A Bony Knee Looked Like.

One [expert] Said, 'always Have A Baby Sitter Who Is Acquainted With Your Children.' If They Were Acquainted With My Children, They Wouldn't Sit!