The British Suffer From A Most Unfortunate

Jokes Are Better Than War. Even The Most Aggressive Jokes Are Better Than The Least Aggressive Wars. Even The Longest Jokes Are Better Than The Shortest Wars.

On The Continent Stray Cats Are Judged Individually On Their Merit-some Are Loved, Some Are Only Respected; In England They Are Universally Worshipped As In Ancient Egypt.

In England The Boy Pats His Adored One On The Back And Says Softly, "i Don't Object, You Know." If He Is Quite Mad With Passion, He May Add: "i Rather Fancy You, In Fact.

Prices In Italy Are Only Slightly Lower Than In France, Which Means That Italy Is A Very Expensive Country For Everyone, Natives, Visitors And Tourists.

The English Have No Soul; They Have The Understatement Instead.