[televised Stand-up] Never Really Makes Me Laugh.

Ignorance Is Better Than Knowledge Misapplied.

It Got Very Tedious Saying The Same Jokes In The Same Way With The Same Attitude.

Your Worst And Most Dangerous Enemy Is The Person That Injures You Under The Pretensions Of Friendship.

I Was In My Peak Physical Condition When I Was About Like, Uh... One. Oh God, I Looked Good, Young And Fresh! You Wouldn't Know Me Now If You'd Seen Me When I Was One, You Know? I Even Looked Good For My Age. People Would Come Up To Me And Go, What Are You, Zero? And I'd Go, No, I'm One Over Here!

[sam] Kinison, When He Started Out, He'd Come To Canada When I Was First Starting, And He'd Always [bomb].