The Man That Does Not Fear Punishment,

Man, Them Engagement Rings, Boy, They Cost A Lot. I Was Looking At 'em. Cost Like A Thousand Bucks, Two Thousand Bucks, Y'know. Three Thousand Bucks. Something Like That- Four Thousand Bucks. Big Number Divisible By A Thousand, Anyways.

Stand-up Has The Best Writers, Because It's The Hardest Writing By A Million Miles.

It Is Easier To Hate Those We Love, Than Love Those Whom We Have Hated.

There Hasn't Been An Original Voice In Stand-up Since Sam Kinison.

Pulp Fiction Is A, Uh, Gritty, Urban Satire. Pump Friction Is A Uh-uh, A Bunch Of Uh, Dudes And Ladies Having Dirty Sex.