Sure I Smoked Pot In Hospital. My

I Am The World's Oldest Teenager. I've Never Lost My Youthful Attitude.

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. When I Went On The Roller Coaster, My Old Man Told Me To Stand Up Straight.

I Tell Ya, I Was An Ugly Kid. I Was So Ugly That My Dad Kept The Kid's Picture That Came With The Wallet He Bought.

My Wife Had Her Drivers’ Test The Other Day. She Got 8 Out Of 10. The Other 2 Guys Jumped Clear.

When I Was A Kid We Were So Poor, If I Hadn't Been A Boy I Wouldn't Have Had Anything To Play With.