Sparklers Are The Gay Cousins Of The

I Watch The Discovery Channel, And You Know What I've Discovered? I Need A Girlfriend.

I Have No Grand Scheme.

Why Do They Collect Garbarge At 5am? Why? It's Garbage. It's Not Going To Go Bad Again.

Is She Crazy, Like It Says On Her Bracelet, Or Is She Just Looking At My Sheets? I Dunno!

I'm A Stand-up Comic. Anything Else I Do Besides That Is A Plus, But Stand-up Comedy Is What I Do, It's What I've Been Doing And It's What I'm Going To Keep Doing.