She Was So Ugly That Her Face

I Looked Up My Family Tree And Found Out I Was The Sap.

I Tell Ya, I Knew My Morning Wasn't Going Right. When I Put On My Shirt The Button Fell Off, When I Picked Up My Briefcase, The Handle Fell Off, I Tell Ya, I Was Afraid To Go To The Bathroom.

It's Tough To Stay Married. My Wife Kisses The Dog On The Lips, Yet She Won't Drink From My Glass.

They Say Love Thy Neighbor As Thy Self , What Am I Supposed To Do Jerk Him Off Too?

I Got Myself Good This Morning Too. I Did My Pushups In The Nude, I Didn't See The Mouse Trap.