Now, They Say That New Zealand Is

This Is What I've Been Waiting For My Whole Life. A President Who's Not Afraid To Tell The Truth About Being A Lying A**hole.

Everybody's Always Asking Me About My Blood Pressure. They Did An Interview Once Where They Hooked Me Up To A Blood Pressure Machine And They'd Rile Me. I'd Yell And Scream, And Then It Would Just Go Back To Normal In A Few Minutes. Everything Else Is Probably Rotting, But The Blood Pressure Is Spectacular.

The Fear Of Health Care Changing Is Beyond Belief. Like There's A Way To Make The System Worse. Really?

If You Don't Drink 56 Bottles Of Water A Week, Scientists Say You Should Take A Garden Hose At The End Of The Week And Shove It Up Your Ass.

What Is The Difference Between A Democrat And A Republican? A Democrat Blows, A Republican Sucks.