New Ipod. It Looks Like An Iphone

I Don't Drink Anymore For Cinco De Mayo. I Celebrate With Mexican Food, Or As It's Known In Mexico: 'food.'

There's Just A Feeling You Get From Certain Things You Do In Life That Just Kind Of Feel Pure And Independent Of What's Actually, Physically, Going On.

Now That Healthcare Is Guaranteed, I'm Frying Everything I Eat. Fried Food And Cigarettes.

Oh Satan You're A Wily One.

Larry King Has Been Married More Times Than Henry The Eighth. We Used To Have That Rhyme To Keep Track Of Them. 'divorced, Beheaded, Died. Divorced, Beheaded, Survived.' With Larry I Think It Goes, 'divorced, Beheaded, Divorced, Escaped. Zombie, Lesbian, Disappeared, Inflatable.