Never Play Leapfrog With A Unicorn.

Girls Are Like Pianos. When They're Not Upright, They're Grand.

Do Unto Others, Then Run

Roses Are Reddish Violets Are Bluish If It Weren't For Christmas We'd All Be Jewish.

I Never Yell, I Never Tell, But I'm Grateful As Hell.

I Thought I Couldn't Afford To Take Her Out And Smoke As Well. So I Gave Up Cigarettes. Then I Took Her Out And One Day I Looked At Her And Thought: 'oh Well,' And I Went Back To Smoking Again, And That Was Better.