Never Have More Children Than You Have

I Was Too Old For A Paper Route, Too Young For Social Security And Too Tired For An Affair.

Like Religion, Politics, And Family Planning, Cereal Is Not A Topic To Be Brought Up In Public. It's Too Controversial.

A Friend Never Defends A Husband Who Gets His Wife An Electric Skillet For Her Birthday.

Cats Invented Self-esteem.

A Child Develops Individuality Long Before He Develops Taste.