My Wife Went Into The Butchers And

There Was An Irish Space Program To Go To The Sun. They Went At Night So They Didn't Get Burnt.

Doctor Told Me I've Got Two Weeks To Live. I Said: "can I Have The Last Week In July And The 1st Week In August?"

A Man Says To His Mate: "my Wife Is A Twin." His Mate Says, "how Do You Tell Them Apart?" The Man Says: "her Brother Has A Beard."

My Father Fought In World War I And Single-handedly Destroyed The Germans' Line Of Communication. He Ate Their Pigeon.

I Said To The Waitress, "there's A Fly Swimming In My Soup." She Said: "you've Got Too Much Soup - He Should Only Be Able To Paddle."