Moving On Is A Gift You Give

Every Time I Get On An Airplane I Figure It's Gonna Get Blown Up. You Live On The Edge.

I Am A Dyke! And I'm Damn Proud Of It!

My Grandson Is Mad At Me. He's Mad At Me Because I Squandered His College Fund On Spanx. It's A Lot, But There's A Lot Going On Here.

Before We Make Love My Husband Takes A Pain Killer. I Blame My Mother For My Poor Sex Life. All She Told Me Was, 'the Man Goes On Top And The Woman Underneath'. For Three Years My Husband And I Slept On Bunk Beds. I'm A Double Bagger. Not Only Does My Husband Put A Bag Over My Face When We're Making Love, But He Also Puts A Bag Over His Head In Case Mine Falls Off. It's So Long Since I've Had Sex, I've Forgotten Who Ties Up Whom. My Best Birth Control Now Is To Leave The Lights On.

I Could Stop And Live Carefully But That's Ridiculous. I Don't Want To Live Carefully.