Live Your Life So That If Someone

Did You Hear About The Woman Who Sent Out 40,000 Valentine Cards Doused In Perfume And Signed, "guess Who?" She's A Divorce Lawyer.

Humor Gives Presidents The Chance To Be Seen As Warm, Relaxed Persons. Humor Reaches Out And Puts Its Arm Around The Listener And Says, 'i Am One Of You, I Understand,' And Implicitly It Promises, 'i Will Do Something About Your Problems.'

It's Amazing How Important Your Job Is When You Want The Day Off - And How Unimportant It Is When You Want A Raise.

Lincoln Was Known To Have Walked Miles To Borrow Books, To Get The Most Rudimentary Form Of Education. So What Do We Do On His Birthday? We Close The Schools!

I Remember When Humor Was Gentle Pokes. I Used To Call It 'arm Around The Shoulder' Humor. Now They Go For The Jugular And They Take No Prisoners. It's Mean, Mean Stuff.