Last Year My Birthday Cake Looked Like

...went To A Bar For A Few Drinks. The Bartender Asked What I Wanted. "surprise Me", I Said. So He Showed Me A Naked Picture Of My Wife.

At Christmas Time We Couldn't Afford Tinsel, So We'd Wait Till Grandpa Sneezed.

Dad Told Me To Stop Running In Circles, I Couldn't, So He Nailed Down My Other Foot!

Never Tell Your Wife She's Bad In Bed. She'll Go Out And Get A Second Opinion.

Everyone Gets Their Rough Day. No One Gets A Free Ride. Today So Far, I Had A Good Day. I Got A Dial Tone.