Last Year My Birthday Cake Looked Like

I'll Tell Ya, I Don't Get No Respect... The Other Day, I Got Back From A Business Trip. I Got In A Cab And Said To The Driver, "hey! Take Me To Where The Action Is!" So Ya Know Where He Took Me? He Took Me To My House!

I Remember The Time I Was Kidnapped And They Sent A Piece Of My Finger To My Father. He Said He Wanted More Proof.

To Give You An Idea How Well I Was Doing At The Time I Quit, I Was The Only One Who Knew I Quit.

Steak And Sex, My Favorite Pair. I Get Them Both Very Rare.

My Wife A Great Driver, She Once Hit A Deer. It Was In A Zoo. There Is A Pair Of Shoes On The Dashboard. They Belong To The Last Guy She Hit