Junior Colleges Are High Schools With Ashtrays.

Mmm, Tastes Like Hepatitis!

You're 28, Why Are You Going To Goth Clubs? Do What I Do, Sit At Home & Wait To Die. You Don't Have To Kill Yourself, You're Just Waiting.

You Don't Cruise The Internet Looking For Your Name And Walk Away With A Good Feeling. So, I Never Do It.

Welfare Is Monetary Methadone.

Of Course On Air I Use Occasional Hyperbole To Tell A Story.