I've Never Been Beaten Up! I'm A

I'm A Drummer. I Can Count To Four And Repeat.

Don't Jack Off A Cactus, You'll Only Hurt Your Hand And The Cactus' Feelings

I'd Probably Be A Burglar, I'd Burgle People.

I'm Not Exactly Sure How Many Kids I Have, But Yes, I Do Miss Them Officially, For The Record. In Case Any Of Them Are Listening, I Love You.

I Can't Stop Bleeding And I Can't Stop Having Sex With Corpses.