I've Lived (in La) For So Long,

What Happens In Vegas, I'm Telling Everyone.

If You Live Far Away From A Person You No Longer Want To Date Just Let Them Know That They Are Geographically Undesirable.

I Saw A Young Boy Eating An Ice Cream Cone, ... I Smashed It In His Face. You Know That Kid Is Going To Remember Me When He's 50.

We Never Had A Pool, Right. So One Summer, I Remember. My Dad, To Make Me Happy. You Know I Was Bummed Out Cause We Didn't Have The Pool. So One Summer He Bought Us This Thing. It Was Yellow, You Laid It On The Lawn, Sprayed It With The Water, Run Across. Slip N' Slide. Yeah. Would Have Been Fun If Dad Checked For Rocks Before He Laid It Down! Slip N' Bleed From The Anus They Should Have Called This Ride.

My Mom And Dad Passed Away From Cancer. Within Nine Months, I Lost Both Of My Folks. Immediately After That, I Had A Horrible Betrayal Where My Brother, Who Worked For Me, Stole A Lot Of My Money. He's In Jail Now.