I'm Quitting The Business Today. I'm Going

In School I Was Pretty Quiet. Kinda Shy Until My Junior Year. But At Home I Was A Freak.

If You Live Far Away From A Person You No Longer Want To Date Just Let Them Know That They Are Geographically Undesirable.

I Think That People Who Do Enjoy My Stand-up Comedy And The People Who Get It And The People Who Are Taken In By It, They See That I'm A Guy That Has Love Of The Game.

Because Of What I Experienced When I Was A Kid, I Want Kids To Have That Kind Of An Epiphany Moment, That Little Jolt, That Little Spark That They See When Dusty ['planes'] Flies Higher Than He Has Before. That Scene Where He Flies Straight Up, And He's Starting To Get Dizzy, And Then Finally It Comes Together. We Forget As Adults. We Get Jaded And We Think That's Kids' Stuff, But For A Kid Who Doesn't Know About Anything Technical Or How A Movie Is Made, They're Just Going To See This And Hear This Beautiful Score And See This Dynamic, Fantastical Thing Happening In Front Of Them.

Then It Was Snack Time, Right In The Middle Of Mass. Right Out Of Nowhere, The Priest Would Look Down And Say, 'let's Have Some Yum Yums!' You Would Get In Line - You Would Jump In The Line - And You Would Go Up And Get The Crouton O'christ.