It Puzzles Me How They Know What

I Never Keep A Scorecard Or The Batting Averages. I Hate Statistics. What I Got To Know, I Keep In My Head.

The Dumber A Pitcher Is, The Better. When He Gets Smart And Begins To Experiment With A Lot Of Different Pitches, He's In Trouble. All I Ever Had Was A Fastball, A Curve And A Changeup And I Did Pretty Good.

I Only Went To The Third Grade Because My Father Only Went To The Fourth And I Didn't Want To Pass Him.

I'd Get Me A Bunch Of Bats And Balls And Sneak Me A Couple Of Umpires And Learn Them Kids Behind The Iron Curtain How To Tote A Bat And Play Baseball.

The Doctors X-rayed My Head And Found Nothing.