I'm An Ice Sculptor. Last Night I

I Thought I'd Go To A Craft Fair, And There Would Be A Jar Of Jellybeans There - "guess How Many Jellybeans Are In This Jar, And Win A Prize". Aw, Come On, Man, Let Just Me Have Some. I'll Tell You What, Guess How Many Jellybeans I Want! If You Guessed A Handful, You Are Right.

A Minibar Is A Machine That Makes Everything Expensive. When I Take Something Out Of The Minibar, I Always Fathom That I'll Go And Replace It Before They Check It Off, But They Make That Stuff Impossible To Replace. I Go To The Store And Ask, 'do You Have Coke In A Glass Harmonica ...do You Have Individually Wrapped Cashews'

A Sleeping Bag Is A Tortilla For A Human.

I Tried To Walk Into Target, But I Missed. I Think The Entrance To Target Should Have People Splattered All Around.

My Sister Wendy Has A Husband And Two Children, And They Have A Family Photo On Top Of The Vcr, Where They're All Looking Slightly To The Left. As Though Something Is Going On Over There! I Guess Something Happened Over To The Left That Made Everybody Happy! Except My Sister Is Cross-eyed, So She Can't Quite Pull It Off. One Eye Is Right-on.