Rice Is Great If You're Really Hungry

I Think Pickles Are Cucumbers That Sold Out. They Sold Their Soul To The Devil, And The Devil Is Dill.

I`ve Not Really Been Angling To Be A Comedian. I Knew Comics And I Loved Them And I Loved Being Funny, But I Didn't Understand The Whole Concept Of Becoming One. My First Couple Of Times On Stage, I Was Like, "this Is What I'm Doing For Sure." I Was So Excited.

I Would Like To Go Fishing And Catch A Fish Stick. That Would Be Convenient. I Could Easily Get A Job At Mrs. Paul's.

So, I Sit At The Hotel At Night And I Think Of Something That's Funny. Or, If The Pen Is Too Far Away, I Have To Convince Myself That What I Thought Of Wasn't Funny.

The Customer’s Always Right.