If You Haven't Already Told Your Kids

I'm Slowly Becoming A Convert To The Principle That You Can't Motivate People To Do Things, You Can Only Demotivate Them. The Primary Job Of The Manager Is Not To Empower But To Remove Obstacles.

Scientists Will Eventually Stop Flailing Around With Solar Power And Focus Their Efforts On Harnessing The Only Truly Unlimited Source Of Energy On The Planet: Stupidity. I Predict That In The Future, Scientists Will Learn How To Convert Stupidity Into Clean Fuel.

The Ability To Work Hard And Make Sacrifices Comes Naturally To Those Who Know Exactly What They Want.

The Amount Of Energy Spent Laughing At A Joke Should Be Directly Proportional To The Hierarchical Status Of The Joke Teller.

Your Business Clothes Are Naturally Attracted To Staining Liquids. This Attraction Is Strongest Just Before An Important Meeting.