I Think Helen Of Troy Must Have

The Thing That Drives Me Crazy Is When Comics Say 'i Have Low Self-esteem.' No You Don't. You're Standing On Stage Asking People To Pay. You Don't Play An Instrument. You Want People To Pay To Hear What's In Your Mind. You Don't Have Low Self-esteem. You Might Have Other Problems.

The Senate Was Holding Hearings On Deceptive Sweepstakes Practices. These Companies Target The Elderly, Making Them Think They're Going To Get A Bunch Of Money, When In Reality They Never See Any Of It. The Most Popular Of These Scams Is Called Social Security.

Everybody's Got A Different Sense Of Humor. It's Just Different Styles.

I'm Not A Big Method Actor. I'm Much More Superficial.

I Feel Most Empires Fell When They Started To Act Human, But Then Look At Russia. They Kept A Pretty Strong Hand, And They Fell From Afghanistan Alone Because Afghanistan Is The Graveyard Of Empires. I Guess You Just Can't Sustain It.