I Think Beating Someone To Death With

Valentine's Day Is A Time To Celebrate The Joy Of Being In Love. Unless You're Single & Lonely Then It's Called Laundry Day.

I Have New Ideas Every Day, And I Always Want To Take On New Challenges.

We Never Had A Pool, Right. So One Summer, I Remember. My Dad, To Make Me Happy. You Know I Was Bummed Out Cause We Didn't Have The Pool. So One Summer He Bought Us This Thing. It Was Yellow, You Laid It On The Lawn, Sprayed It With The Water, Run Across. Slip N' Slide. Yeah. Would Have Been Fun If Dad Checked For Rocks Before He Laid It Down! Slip N' Bleed From The Anus They Should Have Called This Ride.

Trolls Look For Reasons To Hate But Really What They Are Mad At Is The Fact They Are Not Included In Anything Ever.

I Would Still Have Old Ladies Come Up To Me After The Show And Pat Me On The Cheek After I Had Said All This Vulgar Stuff. They Would Be Like, 'oh You're A Silly Boy - We Know You're Just Playing.