I Play A Lot Of Charity Golf

I Have Two Bowls Of Confidence For Breakfast Each Morning.

I Remember When We Were In The World Cup In Australia And I Had To Win The Singles Against Tony Payne, Best Of Seven Legs, To Win It. I Was 2-0 Down But Ended Up Beating Him 4-2.

All This Cuddling And Kissing On Stage These Days, Well It's All Right In Football When Someone Scores A Goal, But Not When You're Playing Darts.

The Crafty Cockney Had A Picture Of The Owner Dressed Up As A Copper, So I Brought It Home, Wore It On Tv And The Name Just Stuck.

I've Got A Nice Little Crafty Deal With The People In Barbados; 10 Days Out There Teaching The Locals How To Play Darts For An Hour A Day. Get Paid For That As Well.