I Only Drink To Steady My Nerves...

There Are Better Things Than Sex, But Nothing Quite Like It.

Attitude Is More Important Than The Past, Than Education, Than Money, Than Circumstances, Than What People Do Or Say. It Is More Important Than Appearance, Giftedness, Or Skill.

I Spent Half My Money On Gambling, Alcohol And Wild Women. The Other Half I Wasted.

I Was Married Once--in San Francisco. I Haven't Seen Her For Many Years. The Great Earthquake And Fire In 1906 Destroyed The Marriage Certificate. There's No Legal Proof. Which Proves That Earthquakes Aren't All Bad.

A Man Who Overindulges Lives In A Dream. He Becomes Conceited. He Thinks The Whole World Revolves Around Him; And It Usually Does.